OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
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