I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
