Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
