She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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