she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Houston, we have a squirter
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
