so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
She announced her abortion via fbk
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
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I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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