Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
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