just come out here and I will go home with you...
only if we run a train.
done.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
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bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
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Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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