Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
there is puke in my bra ... again
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