I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize