You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
