I heard we made out
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
