Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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