i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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