are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
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I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
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Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
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