so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
the night ended with taco bell and tears
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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