Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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