You don't have asthma, your pregnant
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
