throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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