I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
farters have to be the big spoon...
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
why does every cop we meet know your name?
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
