Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
