these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
so much tequila, so little girl.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Randomize
