What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
