I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
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