I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
I wish i was in the wii world.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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