this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
