can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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