Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
