I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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