i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
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