dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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