guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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