just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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