when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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