hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Randomize