please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
i think i just lost a toe
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize