I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
