So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
