Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
