Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Randomize