Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize