Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
