you win again, gameday.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
