With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
my being single is dangerous.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
