how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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