and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Randomize
