In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
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