yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
