i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize