Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Are we in a gay sports bar?
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Randomize
